If I could talk to my teenage self, I would say…
You are worth more.
Don’t let other people define your value. Don’t let boys define your value. Don’t let your body, your appearance, your talents, or your popularity define your value. Because you are worth more. You are worth more than they understand. You are worth more than YOU understand. And nothing you do, nothing you have done, can ever change that.
You are not a failure.
Everyone makes mistakes. You will never achieve complete perfection, and one day you will have to learn to be okay with that. So why not start now? Learn to embrace your mistakes and to let them transform you, rather than hating and punishing yourself for them. You may have experienced some failures in your life, but YOU are not a failure. You are a human. Accept that, and let your past failings steer you towards a better, brighter future.
It’s okay to ask questions.
There are some things that you have “known to be true” your whole life that you are questioning right now, and that’s okay. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that it’s not okay to ask questions or to have doubts. That is normal. It’s a part of discovering yourself. So don’t be discouraged by your confusion, or let your questions and doubts derail you from the convictions in your heart. Rather, let them drive you to find the answers that you are searching for. It may take a lifetime, but it is a worthy pursuit. Because no one else can tell you what to believe. You have to find that for yourself.
You don’t have to do it alone.
Life can be so lonely when you’re a teenager. You don’t think anyone will understand, you expect everyone to judge and desert you, so you isolate yourself as a means of protection. But the thing is, people actually care. They may not have walked in your shoes, but they have faced their own hardships and challenges. They understand pain. And they can walk with you through this. So find someone. Preferably, find someone a bit older, who has experienced a bit more life and who can help you navigate through the mess. Find a youth leader, or a teacher, or a coach, or a counselor, or a family friend who you trust, and talk to them. Let them in and let them help you. You don’t have to do it alone.
You’re going to be okay.
You are going to get through this. You are going to survive. And, believe it or not, you are going to conquer the demons that you are facing right now. It’s going to take some time, and it’s going to take a whole lot of faith. But you’re going to do it. So don’t give up. Give yourself permission to believe that you’re going to be okay. Because one day, years from now, your life will tell the story of how you overcame the impossible. And when that happens, you will look back on this season in your life and you will whisper to your 15-year-old heart, “I get it now. It really is going to be okay.”
Braver Than Before 
Wonderful message Talasi! So true!!!
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Thank you!
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Great message Talasi! I struggled as a teenager with things that seem so silly now to me, I wasted so much time on things that really have no bearing on the world around me and now I realize that time is everything and I’m trying my best to hold onto what and who I can in the time we have left here…I used to worry so much about the future..I had undiagnosed anxiety over cause and effect relationships into the near and far future…it was an awful way to deal with things where it affected me in other ways as well…but now if only I could talk to myself I would say “Natalie, relax..just take a moment to breath, everything will be okay…try not to stress about the future and instead focus on the now…because if you don’t, one of these days you will sit and wonder where the time has gone and how do you get it back?! ….I still stuggle with the concept of the time we all have left…as I age so does everyone else, and that’s something I feel I will stuggle with now.
I love you read and relate to your blogs…I feel so blessed to have met you my friend.
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Thank you so much, Natalie, for taking the time to share such a raw and heartfelt comment. I totally know what you mean about worrying over the future and trying to hang onto the time… I struggle with this myself. But you’re so right. It’s better to just relax and trust that everything will be okay. This is one of the reasons why I am so thankful for my faith in God, because I truly do believe that He’s got it all under control. And when I fear losing too much time, I can just put it all back in His hands and trust that He sees the road map of my life and has me on the right path!
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That’s a great letter to self, Talasi! I’d like to go back and tell my teenage self that too. 🙂
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Wouldn’t it be so nice if we had known then what we know now?!
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This is such a beautiful letter. And it holds such valuable lessons. Love this. ❤️
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Thank you so much, Tanya!
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This is great. it is the attitudes that we have about ourselves that hold us back. If I believe that I am a failure I begin to act like a failure. If I think nobody loves me I begin to people please. I really like your blog. richard
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If I went back I’d hold my teenage self I’d let her curl up in my arms and validate that what she went through was horrible, that her feelings were normal and that she wasn’t alone.
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